So, I was reading Mervyn’s Facebook post today, and I really liked it. I read and re-read it so many times.
As a trainer/coach/teacher/mentor, you must be aware of this bit of human behaviour—after age 13, people won’t change, UNLESS there is an emotional event. Death of a loved one, loss of a job, divorce are just 3 examples of moments when we can and do change. If you’re a trainer, you must understand this. If you have ever wondered why information rarely brings about change, it’s because we are simply not wired that way. The name of the game is emotion.
If you want people to shift in any way, you must create an emotional event for them. I’ve scaled sheer cliffs without a harness, crossed an open body of water using a craft made out of whatever I could find in the jungle while blindfolded, cycled solo for 1000 km—all in the name of seeing what I’m made of. The dangers were real and I don’t advocate those methods in my workshops. Instead, I use drama and specially designed activities to provide emotional danger while eliminating the physical danger. Activities are designed to threaten the participants’ sense of emotional safety. Does he dare reveal aspects of himself to his peers? Is she prepared to be vulnerable in front of her colleagues. These are big enough fears to work with.
Drama is a specialised teaching tool. Not to be taken lightly and thrown into a speech or presentation in the hope that people will listen. Storytellers often fall into the trap of dramatising their stories. It is not wrong. But it is certainly inappropriate for an adult audience because it creates a layer of INAUTHENTICITY. Dramatise things for the very young to feed their minds with as much stimulation as possible, sure. Not really suitable for the developed minds of adults.
When you tell your personal story, it is all about authenticity. Which means you must be vulnerable. So if you can get vulnerable through drama or whatever method, do it. Then when you deliver your story, you may have shifted enough to drop whatever masks and barriers you put up to protect yourself, and begin to be real with your audience.
When I was working as his assistant, I learned so much from him. The experience was invaluable. He’s a very special person in my life. I don’t think he even knows it, but he gave me the courage to change my life through believing in myself more. I’m really grateful towards him. I don’t know if it’s possible, but if it is, I plan to ask him if he could train me in the art of storytelling. He totally changed what storytelling meant to me. He’s a really great guy, my real-life inspiration.
Talking to him makes me feel really intelligent. I think he’s one of the few people I can listen to on and on without wanting to interrupt. HAHA.
From the Sunny Island~! 